Horror Stories: Black Boned Angel in Australia
Life on the road for a traveling musician can be full of rich experiences, interesting new people, fabulous cities, and the incomparable thrill of rolling into town and kicking ass. You may get satisfaction when your plans go off without a snag, but here at Intransitive, we want to know about what happens when everything fails. So we ask the artists: Tell us your Horror Stories! What was the worst gig you’ve ever played? Make it hurt… don’t spare the gore…
This week, Campbell Kneale of Our Love Will Destroy the World and Birchville Cat Motel (RIP), tells us about the disastrous 2007 tour of Australia with his drone/metal band Black Boned Angel. Kneale was joined by James Kirk (of Sandoz Lab Technicians) and Jules Desmond (of 1/3 Octave Band). Come on, Campbell… how bad was it? :
Black Boned Angel tour of Australia 2007
OK OK so the short version goes like this… James is suffering from some kinda vertigo-related illness that means he can’t actually get up off the couch without throwing up. Omigod… a week out from tour, and he is a living wreck. He somehow comes to after taking copious amounts of medication, and manages to get on the plane to Australia. Phew.
First gig, Melbourne. Lovely time. Huge 40 minute drone set. People clap.
Second gig, Melbourne. James’ meds kick in and he proceeds to invite random shop assistants to all our shows. Too many support bands, Black Boned Angel gets threatened with having the power cut off midway through their set and have to cut it back to about 25 minutes. Total bar manager/club bullshit.
Third gig, Sydney. 10 hour drive. James has to be heavily medicated to make the trip. Arrive just in time to set up, quick soundcheck and play. Everybody leaves after the local support bands. My gear malfunctions all night at full volume. Set cut back to about 25 minutes again due to noise complaints. Jules blows the bass amp fuse. No spares.
Fourth gig, Sydney. Can you get jetlagged from driving in a car? I feel like dogcrap and it lasts all day. No mount of coffee will cure my ailment. Jules burns through the handful of new fuses he bought that day at soundcheck and 10 minutes into the show… no bass. Me and James play on. The amp I borrowed sucks. Support bands kick our ass. 10 hours back to Melbourne that night.
Fifth gig, Adelaide. 10 hour drive from Melbourne. Arrive, set up, play to nobody as Dinosaur Jr is playing across town. Jules blows the bass amp after 5 minutes and storms off. Me and James play on. Support bands kick our ass. Halfway through the next bands set we are packed and driving back to Melbourne. Get lost somewhere and have to backtrack 2 hours. Two bands with gear crammed into two stationwagons for 12 hours straight. My arse hurts bad. Arrive just in time to drop our sound-guy to his dayjob at 2pm making it about a 30 hour day-trip.
Sixth gig, Melbourne. Haven’t seen nor heard from Jules in days. Sparsely attended. Jules blows amp three times. Support band kicks our ass. James medication working a bit too well… he is almost arrested earlier that afternoon for scaring little children dressed in a balaclava in a shop in Melbourne.
Seventh gig, Bendigo. Supernice black metal band Nocturnal Graves plays support and kicks our ass. Best band we saw in Australia! Corpse paint, blood, pentagrams. We play for 30 minutes before we blow the entire venue up. Lights, sound, the whole bar… everything went black.
The End.
Tags: 1/3 Octave Band, Black Boned Angel, Campbell Kneale, Dinosaur Jr., Horror Stories, James Kirk, Jules Desmond, Our Love Will Destroy the World, Sandoz Lab Technicians
Now that’s starting a column off with a bang. Who’s got a story to top *that*?
I dunno, Mike! Do you??
Heh. I remember going to Dinosaur Jr in Adelaide, jumping in a cab as soon as they finished to race into town and catch Black Boned Angel…Only to arrive at the venue to watch Campbell pack his gear into the stationwagon.